Random musing #3: On New Year and glimpses across decades (my mother & I)

It is the Sri Lankan New Year today. As I write this post, I hear the noise of firecrackers going sporadically around the city. It will be deafening at the time that is considered astrologically the turn of the year. While I hear less and less of people relying on astrology, many people still take into account the astrologically designated auspicious time to boil a pot of milk in their house to welcome the new year.

It is very much a family oriented celebration here and the day is usually for the family to gather and have a meal together. As a child, I used to like the 'kai visesham' which is an exchange of cash, usually coins, between family members. The only difference between this cash received and any other cash received at any other time is that one does not generally spend it. The impression I received as a kid was that this was my good luck coin for the year and I had to keep it somewhere safe.

I visited the nearby temple earlier this morning with my mother. She, holding my arm, for support. I always feel a bit of pain when I look at her current fragile state. She used to be the most healthy and fittest person in our family, having a compulsive walking for fitness habit. She turned 65 earlier this month and it is during the last five years, that her health has been on the decline.

my mother after her marathon walk, Stockholm ca 2002

my mother during the cancer hospital fund raising trail walk, Colombo ca 2011

I was going through some old albums yesterday and felt like sharing a few of those photos with my mother taken at roughly 10 year intervals.

Indonesia, ca 1984

As the youngest in my family, I usually accompanied my mother as a child whenever she went out - whether it was shopping or visiting friends. In order not to get lost, I would hold on to her hand and it eventually became a habit, as you can see from my school photo here a decade later.

(photo to be inserted next week after I finish restoring it) Sri Lanka, 1994

India, October 2006

The year after I recovered from my road traffic accident, my mother and I went on a trip to north India to celebrate the recovery. That was a very special trip for both my mother and me as that is the only multi-day holiday that we have taken together, without other family members. 

Sri Lanka, April 2015

While I am glad to be providing my arm in support for my mother, it is upsetting to see her weak after having always seen her as the source of strength in my family. It is painful to see a parent becoming weaker over the years but it is more difficult when the decline is unexpected and rapid and particularly when doctors are unable to explain the reasons or provide appropriate treatment. It is upsetting when there seems to be very little that you can do. 

I am thankful however that I did return home this April to be with my mother on her birthday and for the New Year.

Wishing you all a happy and prosperous New Year and be thankful for the time you have with your loved ones!